Friday, July 26, 2013

Oh No! Don't Hit Me!




It's time to be a fly on my wall. You know you love these posts, as you get a glimpse into the randomness that is my life.

~ It's the summer time and I flat out refuse...REFUSE to take out the trash. I simply will not do it, because we can't spray out the outside can (due to us not having a water hose) and I just know there are nasty little creepies in there (read: maggots). I'm PETRIFIED and absolutely, beyond help DISGUSTED by them, so I will not go near the trash. As a result, if the husband doesn't take the trash out, I will just leave it there until he gets frustrated and takes it himself (anything stinky, I'll bag up and send the boy out to toss out). One day, he mentioned it to me and I said "Hey, that's a YOU job, not a ME job." His reply? "I'll remember that next time you want me to kill a bug!"

~ Being that it's July, it's time for a visit from Mama Dukes....my Mom! She came via a Greyhound this time. I kept it a surprise from the kids (somehow). On the day it was time to get her, we drove to the station and I told them we were there to people watch. When she got off the bus, Sebastian was running over to hug her. This lady LITERALLY pushed my 8 year old son out of the way to get to her daughter. Like, pushed him off the sidewalk and scratched his chest in the process. My mom, being the abrasive woman she is, walked over to the lady and told her she pushed her Grandson out of the way and she needed to apologize right now. I thought for sure they were gonna throw down right there. The end result? The lady apologized to him and me.

~ I walk in our bedroom to see my youngest under the blankets, playing a game on the hubs phone. I don't see my husband, so I look in the bathroom and there he is, using his shaving thingy. I ask him what he's doing and he says "Writing poetry." Okay, I deserved that, so I asked him to recite some. Here's what I got:

Here I sit
Brokenhearted
I tried to sh^t
But I only farted

~ This week, we celebrated the birth of two of the most awesome kids I know....my twins. On Wednesday, they turned 9. Sunday, we had their birthday party. They had a blast! My bestie came and, for some reason, Cailin was TERRIFIED of her for the longest time....until she got to go through her purse....

~Anastasia has a case of contact dermatitis on her face. Fun fun! She had to get a steroid shot and has to take prescription Benadryl. Her face....it makes me itch!


Random things that are said around my house:

"You're a big, rainbow whore (horse)" ~ Cailin

*said while running through the house with her shirt up* "Look at my boobies!" ~Cailin

Me to Cailin "You're killing me, Smalls!"
Cailin to me "You're killing ME, bigs!"

"I want a pony for my birthday. A real pony! One I can ride!" Anastasia

"Sometimes, I just feel like a nut. A crazy, nerdy nut. And I like video games!" Sebastian

My mom, while playing a game on Facebook "This is impossible!"
Me to my mom "Nothing is impossible if you just believe!"

That's it for this time.....but see what else is going on with my other flys!

Baking In A Tornado                                     
Just A Little Nutty                               
Follow Me Home....                         
Stacey Sews and Schools                
The Sadder But Wiser Girl                               
Menopausal Mother                   
Moore Organized Mayhem            
The insomniac's Dream                                  
Spatulas on Parade                      
The Rowdy Baker                              
Sorry Kid, Your Mom Doesn't Play Well With Others                                  

8 comments:

  1. Your kids crack me up! I needed to snort coffee this morning. Thanks.

    -The Insomniacs Dream

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  2. I just love all of your Fly on the Wall posts. Your family is so amusing. And if YOU ever run through the house with your shirt up yelling about your boobies I fully expect to hear about it.

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  3. This was GREAT!! Too funny!!
    And I agree with out about the trash! BLECK!! I make the kids do it. ;)

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  4. I'm the same way about the trash--eeewww! LOVED the little poem your Hubs recited--I'll have to remember that one. Funny post!

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  5. Laughing! Nothing says "Grandma's here!" like a public brawl. Glad things ended well ;-)

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  6. I use "You're killin' me, smalls" all the time!
    I love that your mother yelled at that selfish woman! Good for her!
    Please remind your husband-taking the trash out AND killing bugs are HIS jobs. (along with writing more of that beautiful poetry!)
    Hope your daughter is feeling better soon. Itching in this heat must be awful :(

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  7. Poor sweet girl... she makes me itchy too. Hope she's feeling better quickly!
    You're a big, rainbow whore... launched iced coffee through my nose. :D
    I love your family!
    So much fun to read.

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  8. Tell her I want a pony for my birthday too! ;-) I bet she has a better chance of getting one than I do! Thanks for sharing!

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So....what did you think? And are you THAT Sarah Michelle?